I feel sick. I feel wrong. I will sleep with the light on. I didnt brush my teeth. I didnt wash my face. I haven’t picked up the haif from the floor. After a year there is a smell in here. I dont know how im going to do my job tomorrow. The door is ajar. I’m way past crying today. I will starve tomorrow. I want to stab the blister on the sole of my foot. I would smoke if i didn’t have to stand up. Where is a freak accident when you need it? I feel gross. I would drink the beer in the fridge if I didn’t have to stand up. I fell asleep writing this and had a dream so horrible it woke me up the nonsensical type but also I could understand everything it just happened fast eerie wrong someone pinched me Hard in the stomach and I woke up immediately and I could still feel it. All my dreams are weird but this one was extra weird. No comfort. It was seriously scary. I’m restless so I’m having really really bad dreams. Nightmares. I hated it. I can still feel it in my gut. Unsettling. I want to dream nothing please no more